image by Rebekah Choat
Even in the still-dark morning, the world is noisy.
Only during a lull in traffic can I hear you.
You say, “I’ve been here all the time.”
~ Rebekah Choat
Listening
Tag Archives: grace
Icons, Part Four
image by Rebekah Choat
I’m wearing my favorite sweater this morning. It isn’t fashionable. It isn’t in one of the season’s hottest colors. It doesn’t draw attention to me when I wear it.
This sweater has been in my wardrobe for what feels like forever. I’ve worn it during some of the pleasantest weather of my life, and through the roughest storms. It holds up well; even after all this time, it isn’t shrinking, fraying at the hem, wearing through at the elbows, or unraveling at the seams.
I wear it with premeditated intention some days. I wear it on days when I don’t know what to wear. Even when I’m not quite sure where I left it, I can find it by feel in the dark.
This sweater reminds me of a lifelong Friend whose love has never faltered, never fallen apart; One who walks with me through sun and shadow; One who is there, though I can’t see Him, even in the deep darkness.
Tuesday’s Word: blessing
God’s favor and protection
the acts or words of one who blesses
something promoting or contributing to happiness,
well-being, or prosperity; a boon
approbation, approval, encouragement
sanction or support
special favor, mercy, or benefit
The definitions of a blessing cover a broad range, but it seems to me that whichever way you look at it, a blessing is a gift outright. It comes from somewhere outside ourselves, beyond our reach to grasp. We can’t buy it with money or earn it with merit. We can only receive it open-heartedly, accepting it as pure grace.
Yet in the remarkable economy of God, we are somehow empowered to bestow blessings on others. Though we don’t possess the means to manufacture or ensure a boon for ourselves, we are mysteriously enabled to channel favor, mercy, and encouragement to those around us and to contribute to their happiness and well-being.
Icons, Part Two
image by Joel Brotzman-Gonzales
As far back as I can hear in my memory, I have known the call of the mourning dove. From the time I was a tiny little girl sitting on the front porch while Grandma did the early-morning watering, to this morning forty-five years later, sitting on the back patio after doing the early-morning watering, that melancholy, infinitely soothing three-note trill has sounded in my ears, as familiar as my own heartbeat and sometimes as unnoticed, and as centering and reassuring when I listen for it. It is perhaps as close as I can imagine the voice of God, murmuring over and over, “I am here, I am here,” here in this world that is bent and broken but never abandoned; swollen with sorrow, swallowed up by joy poignant as grief.
Good Omens
Rain fell today through shining sun,
and the season’s first hummingbird
drank deep, unafraid, just outside
the kitchen window.
I believe these are good omens.
~ Rebekah Choat
Tuesday’s Word: ritual
ritual: an established or prescribed procedure for a religious or other rite; observance of set forms in public worship
Ritual was anathema in the church of my childhood. I can’t recall ever having been instructed as to why it was wrong, but I came to the conclusion that it had something to do with substituting mechanical actions for real true belief; that following any formal ritual was a sort of religion-by-rote for those who had not prayed through to a genuine ecstatic experience of the living God. At the very least, conforming to ritual would surely be limiting, confining, Spirit-quenching.
Please understand that I am not discounting the sincerity of the exuberant saints among whom I grew up; many of them did indeed demonstrate faith that would move mountains and abiding joy in the face of great hardship.
For me, though, the anything-goes-as-long-as-you’re-enthusiastic style of church meeting was detrimental, to say the least. I – the preacher’s oldest kid, no less! – was expected to beam with the barely-veiled glory of God’s wonder-working hand on my life at all times. Good Christian girls didn’t let the devil steal their shine!
My choice: deceit (or at best exaggeration) followed by guilt, or honesty resulting in condemnation.
As I grow older and continue to work through many layers of deep-seated depression, I am learning that ritual, at its heart, is neither robotic nor repressive; it is, in fact, a healing balm for my soul, a means of saving grace. It is a great comfort to lean into time-honored practices when I have no strength to forge a new path, to repeat well-worn words when I can’t manage coherent composition, to relax into the kinship of common custom.
…ritual and symbol are as necessary to human beings as air and water. They mark us as human and give us identity…Rituals bind a community together, and also bind individuals to a community. ~ Kathleen Norris
The Storming of the Fortress
Words hard as stone bombard the castle walls,
hurled with precision to break my defense,
all heedless of the wintry rain that falls.
A breach is opened in the outer fence.
The gate shivers beneath unflinching blows,
and soon the dauntless warrior gains the keep.
I hide myself, but all too well he knows
the passages that lead into the deep
and lightless chamber where my soul would stay
in silent shadows rather than surrender.
His footsteps near, and now the door gives way.
His grip is strong — but, oh, his voice is tender!
I give myself up; finally I see:
he frees me from myself, in spite of me.
~ Rebekah Choat
Garden Charm
image by Rebekah Choat
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint,
Sweetest of herbs in my garden close,
Gracing the morning with their mingled scent,
Lavender, rosemary,marjoram, mint.
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint,
Holiness, purity, safety and peace,
Comfort, remembrance, healing, content,
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint.
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint,
Happiness, respite from sorrow, heart’s ease,
Brightness and deep breath and friendly intent,
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint.
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint,
Sweetest of herbs in my garden close,
Gracing the morning with their mingled scent,
Lavender, rosemary, marjoram, mint.
~ Rebekah Choat
Grace-gift
A long nap on a
rainy Sunday afternoon –
gentle gracious gift.
~ Rebekah Choat
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